Receuillement/ Thoughts

Le soir apres avoir lu une histoire, fait des mamours et donne plein de bisous, Rachel me parle souvent de papy Christian et avec les larmes aux yeaux me dit qu'il lui manque
Maman: A moi aussi ma cherie, il me manque terriblement
Natalie: je n'ai plus de papy, papy Christian est mort
Maman: oui c'est vrai ma cherie, mais il peut voir de la haut tout ce que vous faites et voit que vous etes tres gentilles

After reading a story, exchanged zillions of kisses and hugs, Rachel once in a while speaks about her grandpa with tears in her eyes
Rachel: Maman, I miss papy Christian so much
Maman: I miss him terribly too ma cherie
Natalie: I don't have a papay, he is dead
Maman: Yes, he is but he can still see everything you are both doing and is proud of his two grand daughters

Rachel was with me in Belgium this last April. She accompanied us to the hospotal, talked to dad and joined us to the church, to the "crematorium" and to the cimetary. She was always at my side and saw me crying many times. Now she is the one who talks about her papy Christian and somewhat it does bring some comfort.

There are nights when I just cry and re-read messages and letters I received upon my return from Belgium. Sometimes I am so mad at him for leaving us that I try to remember only bad things trying to lighten my pain. All I know is that he lived a full life and enjoyed it tremendously. I am glad for that.